Every season, the Drama After Dark team gathers ‘round the (currently virtual) conference room table to watch the latest and greatest in British dramas. This month we’re covering MASTERPIECE’s remake of the classic series All Creatures Great and Small. The series does not disappoint, with eccentric characters, adorable animals, and the vast, rolling hills of Yorkshire. I’m stepping in to recap the season as it happens, while Jackie Bruleigh will be your guide in recapping Miss Scarlet and the Duke (and don't miss us both covering the latter on this season of Drama After Dark!).

It’s breakfast time, and Lesley/Tristan is just rolling out of bed, but it’s never too early to hide from one’s brother, especially when said brother is cranky as heck trying to get into a new suit for a big interview at the local race track. Alas and alack (perhaps because it is so early), both men fail at their tasks — Horrible Boss in fitting his cufflinks, and L/T in hiding. And when HB notices that the petty cash is down to what appears to be two pounds 6 pence, he realizes he has the perfect job for his lay-about younger brother: Accounts Manager.

Meanwhile, being the veterinarian of the house for the day, Sweet Baby James is off on his house calls, only to be foiled by narrow country lanes, and his mortal enemy: Neville Longbottom. They run into an incident that I’m assured is common on country roads in Britain; that is, figuring out who has to back their car up to make way, complete with hollered instructions at each other. After a bit of who’s on first, Neville adds insult to injury (SBJ discovering that Helen is dating him) while also not remembering SBJ’s name. C’mon kid, where’s your rememberall?

Horrible Boss arrives at Darrowby Racecourse for his interview. Surprising to noone, fancy-boy Neville is there as well, and apparently, he’s the one pushing HB for the job. Despite Neville’s good word, however, the man in charge — whom I can only assume is Mr. Darrowby — seems to be even grumpier and snottier than Horrible Boss, sighing over his “lack of experience.” But, as with any good drama worth its salt, a timely horse accident gives him the opportunity to show his work. Naturally, the process is only complicated by Mr. Darrowby’s sniping, and HB’s inability to not snipe back. Friend, that’s not how you ace an interview!

In the field, SBJ arrives at what might be the most picturesque farm we’ve seen yet, where he’s greeted by an adorably weird older woman who has an equally adorable calf with heat exhaustion. Actual footage of me watching this scene:

Alexis Rose from Schitt's Creek grins, and says "boop" while tapping her laptop screen.

Back at the clinic, Mrs. Ma’am catches Lesley/Tristan skulking about the local farmers market, hitting up vendors and shoppers alike for their vet tabs. As she watches, though, her eye is drawn by Helen and Jenny, Helen’s younger sister. While Jenny is truly the friend with haggling skills we need when Boston's outdoor SoWa market re-opens, Helen is less enthused about her good work on procuring chickens, trying to drag Jenny back home. This only leads to a sisterly spat, and some commiseration on the part of Mrs. Ma’am. After all, she knows all about tantrums; she works with Horrible Boss!

Helen confides in Mrs. Ma’am that she wants Jenny to know that there’s more out there for her than a future as a farmer. Mrs. Ma’am offers to give her a break by taking Jenny on for the day — and we all clap our hands at the thought of a mouthy kid getting brought into the mix.

Actress Kathy Bates, with short grey hair and a jean jacket, claps excitedly. She's on a talk show, sitting on a grey couch, with a city scape behind her.

While Helen and Mrs. Ma’am bond over Jenny, L/T notices a farmer who ducked his bill heading into the pub. Using his usual level of good-natured passive aggression, Tristan not only talks the farmer into paying his vet bill, but catches the eye of the cute proprietress as well. And she’s not just a pretty face; she’s clever too. Sly Girl mentions that when men drink, they’re freer with their mouths — and their wallets. But if Lesley/Tristan wants to work in the pub, he’s gonna need to buy a drink as well.

When Sweet Baby James returns to the clinic from his morning out, he finds Jenny helping Miss Ma’am baking cookies. But almost instantly a call comes in, and he’s sent out, once again — to Neville’s house, no less. Once he leaves, Mrs. Ma’am notices that Jenny’s gingerbread men have frowns; a dedication to her sister it seems, since Helen is no longer any ‘fun,’ always insisting that Jenny complete her schoolwork. Which is silly because Jenny’s destined to be the one that has to take care of the farm, right? Right?

Actress Rachel Weisz, a dark haired, olive-toned woman, puts her hand over her mouth and looks around herself, concerned, in a clip from the film "The Mummy."

Back in the pub, Lesley/Tristan is getting on like a house on fire — making friends, AND getting the bills paid. But as he is, he notices something: Sly Girl is running a neat little betting ring with the regulars. Rather be sensible, and question the morality and legality of these goings on, L/T instead flirts with her and then buys a round for everyone at the pub, presumably to impress Sly Girl.

I’m sure Horrible Boss will be suitably impressed, as well.

Arriving at Neville’s stables, James is greeted by three nervy-looking stable hands. Andante, the horse he’s been called to see, is due at the race track imminently, and is suffering from what seems to them to be colic. But to James’ practiced eye, the horse is worse off than that, yet. It seems he has a torsion of the bowel, meaning that the animal's intestines have twisted around themselves, cutting off the circulation to the tissue. But when James suggests that Andante be put down, the head of the stables is anything but pleased, and demands that Horrible Boss come up for a second opinion.

Said gentleman is still at the racecourse, bantering with Neville and the snooty Mr. Darrowby. The conversation turns to Andante, and HB mentions that he’s been caring for the horse since he was a foal — and he hopes to see him win at the race that week. When Mr. Darrowby tries to put him down by calling him a ~farm vet~ (which I suppose is an insult if you survive solely on sarcastic venom like he does), Horrible Boss returns that horses have always been his passion. In fact, he doubles down, informing Darrowby that he served as part of the Army Veterinary Corps in WWI. And then another layer of the Horrible Boss grumpy onion is peeled away; part of his duties during the war was to treat animals injured during battle and then to ‘dispose’ of them once the war was over, as it was cheaper than transporting them home.

...ain’t war grand?

An animated dog sits in a burning room and says "this is fine."

At Neville’s stables, no one has been able to get HB on the phone since he’s in transit and no one bothers carrying their cell phone on this show. Or they haven’t been invented yet. Whatever. Either way, Sweet Baby James can’t stand the sound of Andante being in pain anymore and — albeit extremely reluctantly — puts the animal down ...just in time for Neville to arrive to the stables to see what is keeping Andante from the racetrack. Infuriated, he slams SBJ into the wall. When James explains what was happening, Neville lets him go, but ejects him from the grounds. On the ride home, SBJ struggles with his tears.

Back in the pub, Lesley/Tristan is still flirting with the Sly Girl, but now he’s slightly plastered. When James comes in with the story of his day, L/T goes to buy him a drink — only to discover that he’s been cleaned out by the many rounds he's sponsored for his pubmates. Like a complete ~idiot~ he puts the tiny amount of money he has left on the second-favorite for the next day’s race. Sly Girl questions his wisdom, as obviously Andante is going to win.

A man makes a face that says "yikes"

Meanwhile, back at the house, Horrible Boss is regaling Mrs. Ma’am with his delightful day, thanking her for encouraging him to grow his practice; it made it possible for him to take on this opportunity. But she’s distant, and he notices it, as she's still caught up in worrying about Jenny. But their heart-to-heart is interrupted by a banging at the door, and, as expected, it’s an absolutely furious Neville. In a show of surprising patience and good will, HB takes him into the parlor, letting the man give him a very loud dressing down.

It’s in the midst of this verbal beating that the boys arrive home, just in time to hear HB stand up for Sweet Baby James (!!) and offer to do a post mortem to prove that SBJ’s diagnosis of Andante was correct. Even more surprising in HB’s defense of James is his care for SBJ after Neville storms out; he confirms that the horse was ailing, but then immediately asks after Sweet Baby James’ mental and emotional state.

I’d say we were all learning good lessons today, but as James stumbles over his words describing the day, Horrible Boss seizes on his cautious words, telling him that if the post mortem turns up anything but a bowel torsion, there will be consequences.

An animation of an old etching of a man beating a dead horse.

(...Too soon?)

The next morning, James opts to keep his breakfast to tea in the backyard with Jess the Dog, while inside, Lesley/Tristan turns over the ledger. But Lesley/Tristan’s pride in the state of what’s been paid is nothing compared to Horrible Boss' shrewd sense for just how L/T operates. He demands the cash upfront; and when Lesley/Tristan goes to “get it from his room” and instead dashes into the street, HB is hot on his heels.

But, alas, his younger brother is a bit faster on his feet, and manages to hide from HB in Sweet Baby James’ car, giving our poor boy quite a scare when he hops in to head into the field.

As the boys head through the gorgeous countryside, the two of them get into an argument about the morality — and frankly, intelligence — of Lesley/Tristan’s actions. Distracted by L/T’s horrible Latin, SBJ has some Very British Road Rage when he yet again encounters a car on the single lane bridge. Only this time, it seems his rage is accidentally directed at Helen and Jenny.

Daniel Day Lewis, as Bill the Butcher in Gangs of New York, shrugs and says Whoopsie Daisy. He wears a patchwork vest over a white dress shirt; his hair is pomaded down, and he has a moustache. Behind him, is a group of Chinese musicians.

And while the encounter seems incredibly awkward, between the road rage, the news of Andante, and the very presence of Jenny and L/T, there is some light that shines through: it seems that Neville has yet to pop the question to Helen.

Jim Carrey, as Lloyd Christmas from Dumb and Dumber, grins, showing a chipped tooth, and says "So you're telling me there's a chance?"

Jenny is back with Mrs. Ma’am for the day; and when she shows an interest in the vet side of the house (by playing with an emasculator, natch) Mrs. Ma’am sees her opportunity. Jenny can help take care of the kenneled animals, all for the low, low price of… reading a book.

Horrible Boss arrives at Neville’s stable to examine Andante’s body. And we see that he’s more than a fancy rich boy who’s mad about losing his investment: he’s also an animal owner sad about losing a creature he loved. As HB begins the autopsy, Neville stands by.

Back on the idyllic farm with the weird little old lady and the calf, SBJ and L/T make their way toward the pasture, only to have the weird little old lady call Sweet Baby James “Herriot the Horse-Killer.” Ouch. It seems that word has gotten around about Andante, and she no longer wants SBJ to examine the calf.

Thankfully, James has Lesley/Tristan on his side; and after L/T stands up to the not-so-cute-anymore old woman, the boys head to the barn to take a look at her calf. What starts as a bit of anxiety on SBJ’s part turns into a moment for L/T to support him, the two of them solving the case together. (Aww...) It seems that the farmer lined the cow shed with old skirting board — skirting board that is covered in lead paint. Luckily, unlike how this scene would play out if humans were involved, it seems that getting rid of the boards and medicating the calf will solve the problem.

However, SBJ’s successful diagnosis and help doesn’t keep him from being called a Horse Killer for a second time.

Arthur the Aardvark's clenched fist in a close-up.

It seems that fortune does indeed favor the bold… or at least the incredibly impulsive. Not only has Lesley/Tristan’s bet back in the pub paid out well, but he also gets a kiss from Sly Girl for his efforts. Not bad for an afternoon of emotionally supporting your co-worker.

Back at the clinic, James is finally let off the hook. Horrible Boss did indeed find a significant torsion in his exam of Andante, and comforts Sweet Baby James in his despair. But lest we get too comfortable with the changing of the tide for these two... almost immediately following their conversation, Mr. Darrowby comes to call with an offer for Horrible Boss to take the job as the race course’s vet, provided that he fires SBJ. In an amazing show of empathy and kindness, HB says he won’t be firing James, even though it costs him the role.

Perhaps we’ll have to start calling him Heroic Boss soon, instead!

You can watch episode three of All Creatures Great and Small on GBH passport today!

Read the recap of All Creatures Great and Small, Episode 2 here.
Read the recap of All Creatures Great and Small, Episode 1 here.