June 15, 2010: Shonda Schilling's The Best Kind of Different

CURT SCHILLING IS OUR RED SOX HERO FOR HELPING THE TEAM WIN THE FIRST CHAMPIONSHIP IN 26 YEARS.

HIS WIFE, SHONDA SCHILLING IS A CANCER SURVIVOR, HELPING EDUCATE PEOPLE ABOUT THE DANGERS OF MELANOMA.

NOW IN HER KNEW BOOK, "THE BEST KIND OF DIFFERENT," SHONDA SCHILLING SHARES THE STORY OF THE FAMILY'S STRUGGLE AFTER THEIR SON GRANT WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ASPERGER'S SYNDROME.

THANK YOU FOR COMING.

>> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME.

>> Rooney: AND GRANT IS THE THIRD OF YOUR FOUR CHILDREN?

>> RIGHT.

>> Rooney: READING THROUGH THIS, A LOT OF PEOPLE CAN IDENTIFY WITH THIS.

FOR THE FIRST FEW YEARS OF HIS LIFE, YOU WERE THINKING HE IS JUST THE TROUBLED KID.

HE WAS THE ONE WHO ACTED OUT.

HIS BEHAVIOR WAS A LITTLE DIFFERENT.

BUT WHEN PEOPLE READ THIS, THEY WILL KNOW HE WAS REALLY DIFFERENT.

AND YOU RECOGNIZED THAT WHEN HE WAS THREE.

>> IF HE WOULD FALL TO THE FLOOR WHEN HE WAS HURT AND I WOULD TRY TO PICK HIM UP, I COULDN'T HUG HIM.

AND I THOUGHT, HOW DO I NURTURE A CHILD I CAN'T TOUCH WHEN HE IS SAD.

THERE WAS ALWAYS THIS FEELING, EVEN THOUGH I HAD A CHILD YOUNGER THAN HIM, IN ANY PUBLIC SITUATION, I HAD TO HAVE MY HAND ON HIM.

IT WASN'T THE YOUNGER ONE.

IT WAS HIM.

I ALWAYS FELT LIKE I NEEDED TO BE A STEP AHEAD OF HIM.

>> Rooney: AND YOU TALK ABOUT HOW HE DEVELOPED, ESPECIALLY AS HE GOT OLDER.

HE WOULD GET HYPERFOCUSED ON SOMETHING SMALL, A D.V.D., A C.D., AND DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO MOVE OFF OF THAT.

>> RIGHT.

YOU THINK THAT, OKAY, KIDS KIND OF GET INTO LITTLE THINGS.

BUT HE WOULD GET INTO THINGS LIKE SHARKS, AND HE WOULD KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE SHARKS.

NOT JUST LITTLE FIGURES YOU PLAY WITH AND THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO CARRY ON FOR DAYS.

HE WOULD LEARN EVERYTHING HE NEEDED TO KNOW OR WANTED TO KNOW OR COULD FIND OUT ABOUT SHARKS.

AND THAT WAS ALWAYS DIFFERENT.

WHEN HE WAS READ BOOKS, I WOULD ALWAYS SAY TO HIM, AND I WOULD SAY, THERE IS NO WAY YOU READ THAT, AND HE WOULD READ SPEED READ RIGHT THROUGH EVERYTHING.

>> Rooney: I READ THE FORWARD BY YOUR PHYSICIAN WHO EVENTUALLY DIAGNOSED HIM.

HE SAID A LOT OF THINGS, A NUMBER OF THESE BOYS DEVELOP SAVANT CHARACTERISTICS.

EITHER BY ROTE OR SOME OTHER SYNAPSE CAN DO THAT.

WHAT YOU GO IN DETAIL IN YOUR BOOK IS HE COULDN'T CONCEIVE OF WHAT IS IN SOMEBODY ELSE'S HEAD.

SO IF YOU SAID DON'T OR KNOW OR FREEZE, WHICH IS A TERM YOU USED WITH YOUR OTHER CHILDREN, HE COULDN'T CONCEDE THAT.

>> AND THE PERFECT EXAMPLE WOULD BE THE SWIMMING POOL.

WE WERE AT A FRIEND'S HOUSE AND THEY WANTED HIM TO SPEND THE NIGHT.

AND THEY DIDN'T HAVE A POOL FENCE.

AND I SAID I JUST DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE HE WON'T JUMP IN.

WHEN I'M HAVING THIS CONVERSATION WITH HER, HE IS OUTSIDE AND EVERYBODY IS DRIED OFF AND HAS COME INSIDE, AND HE JUMPS IN THE POOL.

HIS LOGIC OF THINKING IS, I CAN SWIM.

WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL.

HE COULDN'T GRASP THE FACT THAT NOBODY WAS OUT THERE AND HE COULD FALL IN AND HIT HIS HEAD.

HE COULD ONLY THINK I CAN SWIM, SO I DON'T SEE A PROBLEM IN THAT.

>> Rooney: YOU TALKED ABOUT HOW HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH CURT BECAME TENSE.

HE WAS GONE NINE MONTHS A YEAR.

AND YOU'RE THE MOTHER OF THESE FOUR CHILDREN, AND YOU DIDN'T HAVE A NANNY UNTIL THE FOURTH ONE.

I'M IMPRESSED.

HE WANTED TO GET HIM INVOLVED IN SPORTS, AND ALL OF THE OTHER KIDS WERE INVOLVED IN SPORTS.

WHAT WAS KIND OF THE TIPPING POINT?

>> FOR HIM, WHEN HE REALIZED HE WASN'T AROUND.

I WOULD CALL HIM AND I WOULD SAY I'M REALLY FRUSTRATED, AND HE WOULD SAY, FIX IT.

THE PROBLEM IS, WE WERE NEVER EXPOSED TO KIDS THAT WERE DIFFERENT IN SCHOOL.

WE DON'T KNOW.

BUT OUR KIDS ARE BLESSED BECAUSE THEY GO TO SCHOOL WITH ALL KINDS OF KIDS, ALL KINDS OF DIFFERENCES.

SO WHEN YOU'RE NOT WHEN YOU'RE A PARENT THAT THINKS LIKE THE PARENTS YOU HAD, YOU HAVE NO IDEA THAT THIS CAN EVEN EXIST.

WHAT I WAS SAYING TO HIM DIDN'T MAKE ANY SENSE TO HIM.

UNTIL I SENT HIM OUT I WAS REALLY FRUSTRATED WITH POP WARNER, READY TO PULL HIM OUT, AND HE IS FIGHTING WITH ME, KEEP HIM IN.

AND HE IS NOT SEEING HOW HE IS ACTING.

>> Rooney: POP WARNER FOOTBALL.

>> HE WAS OUT THERE TWO MINUTES, AND HE CAME IN AND I WAS SO MAD AT HIM FOR GIVING UP SO QUICKLY.

AND HE SAID, HE IS NOT PROCESSING THINGS.

AND THIS WAS CLEARLY SOMEONE WHO WAS NOT AROUND TO NOTICE THIS.

I WENT ON LINE AND GOOGLED AUTISM, AND I THOUGHT, THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE.

AND HE DOESN'T FIT THIS.

>> Rooney: BUT YOU MADE AN APPOINTMENT AND WENT TO SEE A NEUROLOGIST.

>> WE MADE AN APPOINTMENT BECAUSE WE KNEW HE WAS AD/HD.

AND I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE DIAGNOSIS, BUT I GOT HE WAS A VERY HIGH FUNCTIONING AUTISM CHILD, WHICH IS ASPERGER'S.

>> Rooney: AND YOU TRY TO EXPLAIN HIS BEHAVIOR, LIKE THAT SCENE IN THE AIRPORT WHERE HE WANTS TO GO TO THE PLAY STATION, AND YOU'RE TRYING TO GRAB HIM TO GET ON THE AIRPLANE.

AND EXPLAINING TO OTHER MOMS.

AND YOU CHANGED YOUR M.O., AND YOU SAID, I'M NOT GOING TO EXPLAIN IT.

>> I WAS EMBARRASSED.

AND I THOUGHT, I'M NOT GOING TO EXPLAIN IT.

A LOT OF MOTHERS BELIEVE THE WAY CHILDREN ACT IS A REFLECTION ON US.

THERE ARE DIFFERENT KINDS OF PEOPLE AND DIFFERENT SITUATIONS.

THE BIGGEST POINT IN MY BOOK IS YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON IN SOMEONE ELSE'S HOUSE.

IF SOMEONE WOULD HAVE WALKED DOWN THAT AISLE AND SAW GRANT HAVING A MELTDOWN AND SMILED AT ME AND SAID, IT'S GOING TO BE OKAY, OTHER THAN THROWING THAT LOOK OF CAN'T YOU GET YOUR CHILD UNDER CONTROL, IT WOULD HAVE MADE A DIFFERENCE.

>> Rooney: BUT IT IS COMPLETELY NORMAL.

HE LOOKS COMPLETELY NORMAL.

HE DOESN'T HAVE DOWN SYNDROME.

BUT WHEN HE HAS SOMETHING LIKE THIS, I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY YOU WOULD EXPLAIN IT.

>> THE BIGGEST REASON I WROTE THE BOOK IS BECAUSE I WANTED HIM TO BE UNDERSTOOD.

A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE NOT COMFORTABLE.

THEY THINK IT IS LABELLING.

BUT WHEN YOU PUT IT OUT THERE, WHAT HE HAS, YOU PUT IT ON THE TABLE.

AND PEOPLE KNOW HOW TO UNDERSTAND HIM.

AND THE THINGS HE SAYS THAT ARE TRUTHFUL AND UNFILTERED ARE NOT DONE OUT OF MALICE.

IT IS JUST THE WAY HIS BRAIN IS WIRED.

THERE ARE SOME AMAZING QUALITIES IN BEING ABLE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE LIKE THAT.

WHEN HE GROWS UP, HE IS GOING TO DO SOMETHING HE WANTS TO DO.

HE'S NOT GOING TO DO IT BECAUSE IT IS THE HIGHEST PAID OR THE HIGHEST POSITION.

HE IS GOING TO DO IT BECAUSE HE ABSOLUTELY LOVES TO DO IT.

>> Rooney: WHAT IS THE PROGNOSIS FOR HIM.

WILL HE GET HIS BEHAVIORAL ISSUES IN ORDER?

>> THEY'RE A LITTLE LESS MATURE.

WE TEACH THEM SOCIAL SITUATIONS, AND WE TEACH THEM THE EYE CONTACT.

WE TEACH THEM WHEN SOMEONE IS TALKING, TO LET THEM FINISH.

HE MIGHT BE IN A CONVERSATION, AND HE THINKS HE HAS SOMETHING REALLY EXCITING TO SAY, AND HE IS NOT REALIZING THAT PERSON HAS TO FINISH FIRST.

THOSE ARE THE KIND OF THINGS HE DOES.

BUT THROUGH BEHAVIORAL THERAPIES AND SITUATIONS AND STRATEGIES, WE'RE ABLE TO TEACH THEM THOSE THINGS AND HE WILL GROW UP AND HAVE A NORMAL LIFE AND PROBABLY A REALLY SUCCESSFUL LIFE.

HE WILL PROBABLY MARRY SOMEONE WHO HAS THE INTERESTS HE HAS IN LIFE.

A LOT OF THE KIDS WHO HAVE ASPERGER'S GROW UP TO AND SCIENTISTS.

THEY GROW UP TO BE DOCTORS.

AND A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK THEY'RE QUIRKY AND THEY DON'T HAVE SOCIAL SKILLS

>> Rooney: HOW DID YOU RESPOND DURING THE WHOLE TRIAL WITH THAT KID JOHN ODGREN WHO WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ASPERGER'S.

>> TO SAY THAT ASPERGER'S CAUSED HIM TO KILL SOMEONE IS ABSOLUTELY ABSURD.

THERE ABSOLUTELY WAS OTHER THINGS GOING ON.

BUT HAVING SPOKE TO PEOPLE THE BOOK CAME OUT ABOUT THE SAME TIME HE WAS GOING TO TRIAL.

A LOT OF PARENTS FROM THAT AREA FELT HE WAS GETTING A RAW DEAL.

>> Rooney: OH, YEAH, I THINK THERE WAS A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO FELT THAT.

>> AND THEY DID SHOW SOME COMPASSION TOWARDS HIM.

>> Rooney: HOW ABOUT YOUR OTHER CHILDREN?

HOW HAVE THEY BEEN WITH THIS?

>> IT'S A GREAT LESSON.

THEY LEARN THAT LIFE IS NOT ALWAYS FAIR.

WE NEVER KNOW HOW OUR KIDS ARE GOING TO LEARN THAT.

THIS IS A GREAT LESSON.

SOMETIMES, YOU KNOW WHAT, IF HE WANTS TO WATCH TV, A CERTAIN CHANNEL, THE SHARK PROGRAM, SOMETIMES IT IS EASIER.

IT MIGHT NOT ALWAYS BE FAIR

>> Rooney: BUT IT MAKES LIFE EASIER.

>> RIGHT NOW, YEAH.

>> Rooney: SHONDA SCHILLING "THE BEST KIND OF DIFFERENT," OUR FAMILY'S JOURNEY WITH ASPERGER'S SYNDROME.

THAT'S IT FOR TONIGHT.

I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW NIGHT.

I'M EMILY ROONEY.

GOOD NIGHT.