ALEX CHADWICK, host:

Okay, you get off the plane. It's time to enter the warm bosom of your family, or maybe it's less bosom than say, but a special kind of purgatory.

My dear colleague Madeleine Brand is spending this week with her family. Before she left, she invited our comedic duo, Frangela, to come talk about their family obligations this time of year.

MADELEINE BRAND: Welcome, Frangela.

Ms. ANGELA V. SHELTON (baritone) (Actress): Hi.

Ms. FRANCES CALLIER (hi pitch) (Actress): Hello.

BRAND: Angela Shelton and Frances Callier. Your plans, ladies, I assume you're not spending Christmas together.

Ms. SHELTON: My mother is coming here actually this year.

Ms. CALLIER: It's very exciting.

Ms. SHELTON: …which never happens.

BRAND: So you're hosting - you've never hosted before?

Ms. SHELTON: No. Yeah, my sister is at her boyfriend.

BRAND: Pressure.

Ms. SHELTON: Yeah.

BRAND: And Frances…

Ms. CALLIER: I have almost two-year-old so we're getting ready for Santa.

Ms. SHELTON: Most kids - I've got to do some shopping.

BRAND: It's like tomorrow?

Ms. SHELTON: Like tomorrow because he's upset, but.

BRAND: There is always a black sheep, right…

Ms. CALLIER: Mm-hmm.

BRAND: …in every family. Is there one troublemaker in your family that you think oh my gosh, what is this person going to do this year?

Ms. CALLIER: Actually, I think I can say for both us, we've got multi-black sheep in both of our families.

Ms. SHELTON: Oh, boy.

Ms. CALLIER: In fact, you actually have to call the good people, the black sheep I think.

Ms. SHELTON: Yes.

Ms. CALLIER: Because, otherwise, the list is too long.

Ms. SHELTON: Way too long.

Ms. CALLIER: Just oodles and oodles of problem people.

Ms. SHELTON: Mm-hmm.

Ms. CALLIER: On both sides.

BRAND: So why is it - why is it that these holiday gatherings - we look forward to them all year?

Ms. CALLIER: Oh no, we don't.

BRAND: No, really?

Ms. CALLIER: (unintelligible) is to save space.

BRAND: Really.

Ms. SHELTON: We don't have to lie, right(ph)?

BRAND: Well, some of us look forward to them.

Ms. SHELTON: Nobody looks forward - come on. you know what, that's not true. Here's the deal. You think you're looking forward to it all year and then Thanksgiving happens. If you spend time with your family then, then you start realizing halfway through Thanksgiving Day, you start getting what we call pre-tired.

Ms. CALLIER: Yes.

Ms. SHELTON: Which is you're tired of the even before it's even happened.

Ms. CALLIER: Right.

Ms. SHELTON: You start realizing oh my God, I have to do this in three weeks.

Ms. CALLIER: Yes.

Ms. SHELTON: Again.

Ms. CALLIER: Yeah, you have to get on that plane. You got to sit in that middle seat only to go home to be - for people go, why aren't you married? How come you don't have babies? Why didn't you come home?

Ms. SHELTON: What is (unintelligible)? I didn't see you.

Ms. CALLIER: I didn't see you our TV this week. Maybe, you should stop doing that acting, yes.

Ms. SHELTON: You know, it's just you can't even.

BRAND: So is it better to not travel to not go to the relatives' home or is it…

Ms. SHELTON: Oh, it is beautiful. This city - this city is beautiful without anybody. Everybody's gone; it's like a ghost town. It's like I thought "I Am Legend." It's wonderful; we're the only people in the city. It's beautiful.

BRAND: Wow. That's a laugh.

Ms. SHELTON: That didn't sound like the holiday spirit in a strange way. Everybody's gone.

Ms. CALLIER: Yeah.

Ms. SHELTON: It's great.

BRAND: What about their presents? That's always the tough one, right? Buying for your parents.

Ms. SHELTON: Well, I have this friend whose brother is in the Scissor Sisters. And you know, internationally huge band, right? For Christmas, he's like he got his parents a coffee table book - a very nice book that they like about, something they're interested in like horses or something. But his brother, of course, got them dinner with Billy Joel.

(Soundbite of laughter)

Ms. SHELTON: And it's like, he can't ever, ever win.

Ms. CALLIER: No.

Ms. SHELTON: And me and my sister there's constant competition with one of my aunts who is always out (unintelligible). We're always trying to get my mom to cry, right? Like touch her more deeply than the last. And she has beaten us the last three years running.

BRAND: Really?

Ms. SHELTON: Like she got - my grandmother used to sing in the jazz band. And so my aunt got recordings of my grandmother's singing. She got the re-mastered and put on CD. And we had taken all these pictures and made a few picture display, I was like uh, she won again.

(Soundbite of laughter)

Ms. SHELTON: But we keep losing.

BRAND: All right. So there's always that point where families just melt down, right? Where (unintelligible) come out…

Ms. CALLIER: Right, right.

BRAND: Yeah.

Ms. CALLIER: The tensions overflow.

Ms. SHELTON: Yeah. In my house when that happens, we don't, like, talk about it or take a time out and then talk about it. What we do is we go and e-mail each other.

BRAND: Right then and there?

Ms. SHELTON: It's an abuse of e-mail. My mother started it. And it's our fault because we taught her how to use e-mail. So what happens is something will happen this awkward or a W-moment, and you think it's kind of gotten over. And, like, a few a hours later, the next day, you'll go check your e-mail and you will read this e-mail: Angela, left I - when you were passing the gravy, I felt like you were annoyed with me, but I didn't what - and it will be like three pages, right? It starts with like: You are the most beautiful baby I've ever - just tells you (unintelligible) at.

Ms. CALLIER: Right.

Ms. SHELTON: And you have no idea what she's talking about, right? But if you try to have the conversation - she's like what are you talking about.

Ms. CALLIER: And then she runs out the room again?

Ms. SHELTON: Why? Exactly. You have to communicate through the e-mail.

Ms. CALLIER: In my family, when it melts down, you just get stabbed.

BRAND: I see that's - at least, they're being direct.

Ms. CALLIER: Very direct.

Ms. SHELTON: Not quite, I think. It's proactive.

Ms. CALLIER: Yeah, (unintelligible)

BRAND: It's not passive-aggressive.

Ms. SHELTON: If you defy statements, I want to stab you.

Ms. CALLIER: You. Yeah, exactly, exactly.

Ms. SHELTON: Clinically speaking, it's much healthier.

BRAND: Words to live by. Well, thank you ladies.

Ms. SHELTON: Thank you.

Ms. CALLIER: Thank you.

BRAND: That's Frangela: Angela Shelton and Frances Callier. Happy holidays.

ALEX CHADWICK, host:

And thank you for that interview, too, Madeleine Brand on DAY TO DAY. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.